When artists sign up for network television specials they start out by looking for a venue that is renowned in the music business. Elton John filmed a concert at the Sydney Opera House. DMB filmed at Red Rocks Amphitheatre. Back in the day The Doors recorded their show at the Hollywood Bowl. Even Timberlake scooped up Madison Square Garden for his recent HBO show. So naturally when Martina McBride was looking for a venue for her own TV special she looked no further than the legendary iWireless Center in Moline.
You know it's going to be a good night when the two women who sit down in front of you immediately spill beer on the head of the snooty woman in front of them before the concert even begins. For me it makes the whole trip worthwhile. In all honesty the two women were two of the oddest ducks I've ever seen. As the night wore on their behavior became ever weirder. To make matters worse one (or both) of them had a strange, pungent odor that permiated the space around them. Rachel and I couldn't figure out if it originated from their underarms, feet, or some other section of the body. I must admit that the blonde woman was a little stranger than her more masculine friend. Some of her friends had seats on the floor and whenever she wanted to get their attention she would let loose with an ear-piercing "Ca caw! Ca caw!" like a wild bird of prey.
When the concert began and Martina rose from below the stage she started bawling and continued through the entire song. She veered from one emotion to the next throughout the show. The next minute she was spastic acting like she was going to rip open her shirt and show us her McBoobies. At one point she and her friend started singing loudly and dancing with one another. The camera guy couldn't get there quick enough to capture the moment. I pray that it makes it on the air so you can see Rach and I giggling in the background. Truth be told anytime the camera was around I burst out in song like it was my American Idol audtition. Rachel had to remind me that some lyrics just look wrong coming out of a guy's mouth. Hopefully they leave me singing "He thinks I'm pretty. He thinks I'm smart" on the cutting room floor. Near the end of the show another one of blondie's friends came over to join in the festivities. I missed a song or two because I couldn't take my eyes off the woman's breasts. Location-wise, they were the highest mammary glands I'd ever seen. They were basically shooting out of her neck. Bet you don't see that at Radio City Music Hall.
Set List
Anyway
When God-Fearin' Women Get The Blues
Wild Angels
My Baby Loves Me
Tryin' To Find A Reason
How I Feel
Happy Girl
(I Never Promised You A) Rose Garden
You Ain't Woman Enough
Help Me Make It Through The Night
Where Would You Be
Concrete Angel
For These Times
Love's The Only House
Blessed
This One's For The Girls
A Broken Wing
Independence Day
Encore
Don't Stop Believin'
Hit Me With Your Best Shot
Post-Taping Set
It's My Time
Cry Cry (Till The Sun Shines)
She's A Butterfly
Safe in the Arms of Love
Ashes
If I Had Your Name
Whatever You Say
Phones Are Ringin' All Over Town
Cheap Whiskey
Heartaches By The Number
I'll Still Be Me
Somewhere Over The Rainbow
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