Ella and I ventured back to Wal-Mart this morning and it is apparent that I could write a book just about my adventures at the supercenter. We picked up a few assorted items and headed to the checkout. I took everything out of the cart and the woman began scanning each of them. Here's how the rest of the exchange went down. The cashier's words are legit but mine have been made up for dramatic/comedic effect. Basically I didn't have the balls to really say anything and just responded with "uh huh."
Her: You gonna pay for that? (pointing to the donut sack that Ella was holding)Me: Oh I'm sorry. I forgot she had that. (handing over aforementioned donut sack)
Her: You weren't trying to steal that were you?
Me: Well times are tough but I think I can afford the 45 cent donut (followed by a lame chuckle).
Her: Ya you don't wanna get caught shoplifting. Trust me.
Me: Thanks for the advice.
Her: I once shoplifted a digital camera from K's Merchandise, but they caught me in the parking lot.
Me: Better luck next time.
Her: I had to stay in jail for 60 days. They're not nice to you in jail.
Me: Ya I've seen Ernest Goes To Jail and it was brutal.
Her: Luckily my mom and dad got me out.
Me: Wow, they must really love you to keep you locked up for two months.
Her: (smoky laugh) Here's your receipt. Have a nice day.
Me: You too sticky fingers.
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