Clean-up on aisle 11

This morning the kids and I went to Wal-Mart while Rachel was working. We're having Rachel's birthday party with my side of the family tomorrow and needed to pick up some snacks. It was insanely busy throughout the store. I've seen July days at Walt Disney World with fewer people. Ella recently discovered the large, oversized carts that have actual seats attached to them. I strapped both of them in and made my way through the store. Immediately I discovered that it was going to be a work out because it kept veering to the left. I'd try to push it straight and it would invariably start careening into an old couple's cart. By the time I had gotten the first two things on my list I was sweating. I felt like I should have one of those signs attached like you see on the back of semis: Makes wide right turns. As we continued making our way through the food aisles I turned at one point and almost ran into yet another fellow shopper. I apologized and tried to move my hearse-sized cart out of the way. Well when I did, it once again got away from me and went crashing into a large display of Doritos. It was like when you get to the end of Jenga and with one idiotic move all of the pieces collapse. I swear that 53 bags of Fiery Habanero Doritos toppled onto the three of us. I paused there for a moment just in shock as I felt the embarrassment creep up into my face. Liam started laughing uncontrollably while Ella was annoyed. "Why did you do that Daddy?" she kept asking again and again. I ignored her and got down on my knees to begin picking them up. The bags were completely blocking the main aisle so there was a pile-up of people just watching me and I'm sure secretly critiquing my stocking ability. To make matters worse I heard a boy behind me say "Hey Mr. Ritchason, was that you who knocked all of those over?" I looked up from my spot on the floor to see one of my students who I'm constantly harping at to pick up all of his crap that he leaves on the floor. The shoe's on the other foot this time it seems.